13 August 2018

Meditation – this is something literally everyone recommended I should do after I got my diagnosis… but how?!?! I had some experience with guided meditations through my travels and yoga practices, but needed to find a way to bring regularity into this….. I quickly discovered Headspace (thanks Oli!) and when I could no longer run away from my thoughts and feeling, as I had pneumonia and was stuck in hospital, it was my anchor and it literally saved me from going insane 😉

I always want to be good at everything and most of the time I am not…. I was the one, who could never turn a wheel, I cannot roll my tongue and the list of thing I am not good with is long…. and with meditation I had this feeling that I am not good at it either…. but there is a difference. I figured that I don’t have to be ‘good’ – I just have to do it! Just taking out 10 minutes every day, 10 minutes you only care about yourself, is all it takes….constant dripping wears away the stone 🙏

My peak meditation time was in Bali and somehow the regularity stopped then…I came back all calm, strong and somehow did not get the hang of it any more…I added the 7Mind app into my repertoire, which is in German, then Calm for meditation sounds, checked out Amazon prime for chanted mantras, downloaded the SeeBeNow app, which features a few of my teachers from Bali and also includes yoga, even upgraded my Headspace account, which I can all highly recommend…. and I remembered something I started in hospital back in December – listening to Laura Seiler‘s Daily Self love advent calendar, which I did not like at first…. too soft, too mellow, too much positivity – all kippers and curtains to me … it seemed all too commercial, but I listened to some of her podcasts lately and she seemed calmer, more real or maybe it was me, who changed…. and yesterday I did her “Spiritual Sunday” meditation – and it was very powerful and I was weeping like a little child! She mentioned at the end that people meet in many cities to exchange experiences…. and I signed up for it. It’s tonight….I am a bit scared, but want to be open to new things….and suppose I can always leave, if it is too spiritual for my likings 😉

I have always been open to this, but sometimes it is too much…. remember me having to feel someone’s aura?!? Sorry, I am too much of a head person for this! But mindfulness is something I am focusing on! I return to Eckhard Tolle, who’s voice I got slowly used to over the years and listen to the podcasts Oprah’s Supersoul, 7Mind and Laura’s Happy, Holy & Confident ….. let me know what you can recommend!

Music therapy ties in quite nicely to this topic today as we talk about our feelings, music and meditation. We are singing a Tibetan mantra – and suddenly, I am in McLeod Ganj…. where I did a silent retreat with a Tibetan nun years ago…. I see the misty hills, hear the bells and the chanting in an incense enriched air, before we travel to Polynesia and I am on the beach, with flowers in my hair moving in the sea breeze, feeling the sand under my feet resting my mind while gazing at the calm sea…..an African tune puts me in the middle of a group of little boys playing soccer on a dusty field with red sand clouds twirling above their heads. I leave filled with happy moments until we meet again in September! I will check out Jon Kabat-Zinn in the meantime ….Thank you, LebensWert e.V. for this little weekly bliss!

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