Today I am back in the medical world… I had no energy yesterday, there is still a lump in my breast and it was bleeding and therefore I am at the doctor’s first thing in the morning (but did send a What’s App to Prof. Dr. Breidenbach yesterday not to get into trouble again 😉).
My mental state was similarly low, as I still do not have the energy to do what I want. I would like to go swimming, but I can’t and I just feel fed up with this stuff…. maybe it’s just easier during winter to be sick or rather limited, as there are not that many opportunities out there?!? There are still loads of things I actually CAN do and I will concentrate on them!
Prof. Dr. Breidenbach is happy with my progress, gets some more blood out of my breast, but is not happy with the look of my breast ….. I could not agree more. It looks more like a crater landscape than a normal breast after the swelling has gone down. To tackle the rest of the , I have to massage it and put white cabbage leaves as much as I can and she said if the breast would be radiated in this state, it would stay like this 😳 I will cover myself in cabbage and postpone radiation!!
I discussed the anti-hormone therapy… or rather my disagreement being now a triple negative breast cancer patient! The tumor conference decided to give me AI and GnRH, which have heavier side effects than TAM…. these medications are normally given to patients with hormone receptive cancers!! I still do not see the point and will object. TAM is something I could try, but my feelings – and mainly my mind – say no! We shall discuss the matter and I sent my regards to the tumor conference 😉
There is no way that chemo will be started during radiation, says Prof. Dr. Breidenbach, as it simply would not work! No discussions! Good – this way I can concentrate on one treatment at a time!
I am also seeing a non-medical practitioner today as per Claudia’s recommendation. She is into traditional Chinese medicine (TCM), 5 elements nutrition and acupuncture and I have a free trial…. it won’t do any harm, I guess, but it is yet another appointment to fill my day and as I said … I am a bit fed up, but feel that I can benefit and agree to do it. Nutrician and cancer are linked, but since I – apart from to many sweets – am a healthy eater, I did not pay too much attention to it yet. I like the holistic approach of TCM tackling the working on the cause of an illness and not only the symptoms! My first homework is a questionnaire with millions of questions….. pfewww…. my motivation sinks a bit, but I will do it…. just not today!
To add a new dimension, there is blood in my stool … just what I need, but thinking about Amy, I will see a doctor asap!
Anyhow, the weather is nice and I scroll along the Rhine river, enjoy the peace and quietness and forget everything for a while! I breath, rest, feel happy and get the info that our household aid Steffi’s car broke down…. there is always something, but I am on my way home to enjoy our terrace, meditate and enjoy a quiet afternoon with my kids! I am grateful for what I have, but just sooo tired and will take it easy today!